Fate

What decides fate,
Or it’s many other names?
They say destiny is innate
But it’s history puts it to shame.

Is the Holocaust then necessary?
The genocides inevitable?

Who decides who lives and who dies?
Or better, not who, but why?

To whatever being there may be,
In what way does this need to occur?
The kids starving of hunger or bombed at birth,
Is that what they deserve?

Such an interesting word that, deserve.
The Hindus call it karma,
But can the death of kids really be called karma?

Forget reincarnation
I believe in blank slates.
Even forget death,
Let’s talk about day to day things.

If I break my ankle,
was that deserved?
Was it because I was an ass to someone
Or because I bullied her?

If I failed a test,
is it because I called my friends idiotic?
If I felt discriminated,
is it because I wasted water?

I don’t understand fate,
I don’t understand it at all.

How can I change my life
If it was never written at all?

So instead I’m floating—
Going where the wind takes me
It’s easier never to think of this
But gosh there’s moments my mind can’t stop falling.

At least, that’s what it feels.
To never have answers to the questions that appear.

A quote is stuck in my head,
which Einstein said,
he said “God does not play dice with the universe”.

And yet he was wrong
Wrong in the fact that he does.
In this world of probabilities
I guess it’s a casino after all.

So then was Einstein lost,
Just as I am?
Was he unable to comprehend
What fate had at hand?

Camus writes that suicide is
The world’s greatest problem.
But to me, undoubtedly,
Fate seems like a harder pill to swallow.

Because then was suicide fated?

It’s that sentence that makes me wince.
I’ve lost too many to this thought,
No scratch that, the world has.

To them I say fly high,
whatever that may mean.

To them I say there’s no such thing as fate,
You deserved to be the happiest you could be.

It’s us that failed you,
Not some higher being known as God.
We should’ve answered your questions,
fallen together all along.

I want to say sorry,
sorry that we failed.

Sorry you couldn’t live
Like the Gita had prevailed.

Sorry for this twisted world
That forces you to ask these questions.

Sorry for creating your internal tension.

Sorry for the memories we lost.
Sorry for not making the past
Consist of more memorable thoughts.

I want you to know
I love you,
We all do.
These words come from a genuine place
Because you are you.

Every person contributes something,
Even at their darkest times.
Just know yourself is all we need
Your smile, your presence,
All of it is a good deed.

You are God’s gift,
Nothing is better.

Just remember that dearest reader,
Your presence is an honor.